I had an experience this morning that was affirming and confirmed for me: if you allow it to, the Bible really does become alive and “speaks” to you. It doesn’t happen overnight, but in my experience, the more I approach the Bible not to “retrieve and study information,” but just to enjoy and read, or just to absorb more of who Jesus was, the more it seems to reflect back to me my own particular experiences. Those are the times the Bible communicates in a way where it’s like someone is talking to you and you go “aha, I see.”
I was taking my time reading through the rest of John 11 and seeing what stood out most to me. I ended up paying most attention to the second half of the chapter, when Jesus arrives at Bethany, and meets up with first Martha, and then Mary.
17 On his arrival, Jesus found that Lazarus had already been in the tomb for four days. 18 Now Bethany was less than two miles[b] from Jerusalem, 19 and many Jews had come to Martha and Mary to comfort them in the loss of their brother. 20 When Martha heard that Jesus was coming, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed at home. 21 “Lord,” Martha said to Jesus, “if you had been here, my brother would not have died. 22 But I know that even now God will give you whatever you ask.” 23 Jesus said to her, “Your brother will rise again.” 24 Martha answered, “I know he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.” 25 Jesus said to her, “I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die; 26 and whoever lives by believing in me will never die. Do you believe this?” 27 “Yes, Lord,” she replied, “I believe that you are the Messiah, the Son of God, who is to come into the world.” 28 After she had said this, she went back and called her sister Mary aside. “The Teacher is here,” she said, “and is asking for you.” 29 When Mary heard this, she got up quickly and went to him. 30 Now Jesus had not yet entered the village, but was still at the place where Martha had met him. 31 When the Jews who had been with Mary in the house, comforting her, noticed how quickly she got up and went out, they followed her, supposing she was going to the tomb to mourn there. 32 When Mary reached the place where Jesus was and saw him, she fell at his feet and said, “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” 33 When Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who had come along with her also weeping, he was deeply moved in spirit and troubled. 34 “Where have you laid him?” he asked. “Come and see, Lord,” they replied. 35 Jesus wept.
What I discovered from reading this passage was that Mary and Martha have very different ways of operating. Why didn’t Mary go with Martha to meet Jesus? I don’t think it was out of disbelief or rejection of Jesus—when she meets the Lord, she says the exact same thing that Martha said: “Lord, if you had been here, my brother would not have died.” And there are small details that I’m now noticing but don’t fully understand. The passage says that she went quickly.
I’m not a theologian and I’m learning to just read the Bible for myself. Sometimes it’s good to rely on other commentaries or “more valid” sources of interpretation, but sometimes I just try to connect the passage back to my own life. Martha and Mary are clearly different processors. Martha is very cognitive. She believes in Jesus. She answers his questions and affirms her faith in a thoughtful, theoretical way. Mary seems to be more in tune with her emotions. She falls at Jesus’ feet. She weeps, which moves Jesus deeply. How many other instances in the Bible do you see Jesus being moved deeply in spirit?
My wife and I have had many arguments stemming from the same realization: she is probably more like Mary. She feels her emotions deeply. Sometimes it incapacitates her (is that why Mary did not go out to meet Jesus initially?). I’m probably more like Martha: I think too much. I’m more even-keeled, but I lack power and resonance (why did Jesus ask specifically for Mary?)
Jesus clearly loved both of them. I know there’s one other instance in one of the gospels where Mary is commended for her devotion and fixation on spending time with Jesus while Martha is busy running around trying to be a good host. And even in this instance, maybe our initial reading is that Jesus prefers Mary to Martha. But then I go back and realize in verse 5 it says, “Now Jesus loved Martha and her sister and Lazarus.”
My main takeaway, for myself, is that as a “Martha” I can learn from Mary. Jesus had very powerful emotions. I tend to overthink or have my logical side dominate when my wife and I have conflict: “come on,” I’m saying internally to myself. “I’m being calm and patient and saying all the right things. I’m very rational in understanding the situation, so why can’t you also do the same so we can communicate better and resolve this conflict?” This passage is showing me, by my interpretation (which may be wrong), that sometimes moving someone else’s spirit only comes through channeling your own raw, unfiltered emotions. There’s a power in connecting through that, that then moves Jesus to perform his miracle.
Maybe I’m “reading too much into it,” but I also, upon reading this passage, had an experience for the first time where I was also deeply moved for someone else. We all have those people that we say “I’ll pray for you” but then never really do. After reading this story, I was thinking about someone I had prayed “intellectually” for before. But this morning, I really felt it. I had a more powerful prayer for them when I was moved to tears for them and their situation. I felt like I really cried out to God for them.
Thank you Lord for the wisdom of your bible.
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